Bekijk Volledige Versie : Urgent . Reuters Flash
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We just received some sad news...
Washington Post - January 20 , 2002
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Washington, DC (Reuters) -- A tragic and sad fire has destroyed the personal library of President George W. Bush. Both of his books have been lost. The president is reportedly devastated -- apparently, he had not finished coloring the second one.
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Men gelooft het bijna niet , maar ook in de USA bestaan kritische geesten
hier een paar 1-liners:
How did our oil get under their sand?
The last time we listened to a Bush, we wandered in the desert
for 40 years.
Don't blame me, I voted with the majority.
How many Lives per Gallon?
http://www.nrc.nl/images/1811AP1FOKSUK,0.gif
http://cagle.slate.msn.com/news/Inspections/BESTinspections/cagle0jkh0.gif
Geplaatst door Canaris
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We just received some sad news...
Washington Post - January 20 , 2002
************************************************
Washington, DC (Reuters) -- A tragic and sad fire has destroyed the personal library of President George W. Bush. Both of his books have been lost. The president is reportedly devastated -- apparently, he had not finished coloring the second one.
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end of text
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Heb deze post even per E-mail naar mijn vriend gestuurd, kreeg ik het volgende per E-mail;
vreselijk, vreselijk, vreselijk!!
Die arme man, kan die ook niet meer terugvallen met zijn speeches op de
orthodox christelijke en fundamentele teksten van het oude en nieuwe
testament.
Misschien kunnen wij hem de Koran sturen!
Loopt Laura, de eerste vrouw in het beloofde land van de verenigde staten,
misschien binnenkort in Burqa!
Couscousje
07-02-03, 11:03
George Bush was benieuwd of hij nog een beetje populair was onder de Amerikaanse jeugd en bezocht een school. Hij hield een korte toespraak en vroeg de kinderen of ze misschien vragen aan hem wilden stellen...
Bob stak zijn hand op en zei: "Ik heb 3 vragen voor u."
1) Hoe heeft u de verkiezingen kunnen winnen, ook al had u minder stemmen?
2) Waarom wilt u Irak aanvallen zonder geldige regels?
3) Denkt u, net als ik, dat de bom op Hiroshima de grootste terroristische daad van de vorige eeuw is?
Op dat moment gaat de bel en de kinderen rennen de klas uit. Na een kwartier zit ieder weer op zijn plek en Bush stelt de kinderen opnieuw voor om hem wat vragen te stellen.
Nu steekt Joe zijn hand op en zegt: "Ik heb 5 vragen voor u."
1) Hoe heeft u de verkiezingen kunnen winnen, ook al had u minder stemmen?
2) Waarom wilt u Irak aanvallen zonder geldige regels?
3) Denkt u, net als ik, dat de bom op Hiroshima de grootste terroristische daad van de vorige eeuw is?
4) Waarom ging de bel 20 minuten te vroeg?
5) Waar is Bob?
Cc
Couscousje
07-02-03, 11:04
http://www.webdesignlab.co.uk/niksthings/masking.html
Cc
Geplaatst door Couscousje
George Bush was benieuwd of hij nog een beetje populair was onder de Amerikaanse jeugd en bezocht een school. Hij hield een korte toespraak en vroeg de kinderen of ze misschien vragen aan hem wilden stellen...
Bob stak zijn hand op en zei: "Ik heb 3 vragen voor u."
1) Hoe heeft u de verkiezingen kunnen winnen, ook al had u minder stemmen?
2) Waarom wilt u Irak aanvallen zonder geldige regels?
3) Denkt u, net als ik, dat de bom op Hiroshima de grootste terroristische daad van de vorige eeuw is?
Op dat moment gaat de bel en de kinderen rennen de klas uit. Na een kwartier zit ieder weer op zijn plek en Bush stelt de kinderen opnieuw voor om hem wat vragen te stellen.
Nu steekt Joe zijn hand op en zegt: "Ik heb 5 vragen voor u."
1) Hoe heeft u de verkiezingen kunnen winnen, ook al had u minder stemmen?
2) Waarom wilt u Irak aanvallen zonder geldige regels?
3) Denkt u, net als ik, dat de bom op Hiroshima de grootste terroristische daad van de vorige eeuw is?
4) Waarom ging de bel 20 minuten te vroeg?
5) Waar is Bob?
Cc
:hihi: :hihi: Hep um gelijk doorgemeeld.
George W. Bush's Intelligence Quiz
While visiting England, George W. Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people. He asks how she knows if they're intelligent.
"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate."
She phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister. Please answer this question: Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"
Tony Blair responds, "It's me, ma'am."
"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"
"Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"
Upon returning to Washington, he decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. He summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."
"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"
"Uh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
Helms hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?" Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem.
"Now look here Colin Powell, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother, or your sister. Who is it?" Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course, you dumb ass."
Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!" And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, you dumb ass, It's Tony Blair!"
LOl
Ik zit nu dus echt met tranen in mijn ogen. Heb dit even aan mijn B-Partner verteld en ik kwam er bijna niet uit omdat zo moest lachen
Orakel dank je wel Kostelijk
Die arme man, kan die ook niet meer terugvallen met zijn speeches op de
orthodox christelijke en fundamentele teksten van het oude en nieuwe
testament.
Misschien kunnen wij hem de Koran sturen!
Inderdaad, 1 pot nat!
http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/graphics/bush_binoculars.jpg
and than I said to jeb
screw florida
http://www.sillyguy.com/antibush/bush%20pics/bushdance.gif
classic quotes from our new illiterate prez!
Bush said he wanted his administration to be remembered for making America ``a more literate country and a hopefuller country.''
• "They want the federal government controlling Social Security like it's some kind of federal program."
• "It's your money. You paid for it."
• "Drug therapies are replacing a lot of medicines as we used to know it."
• "I understand small business growth. I was one."
• "Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods."
• "I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family."
• "The senator has got to understand if he's going to have-he can't have it both ways. He can't take the high horse and then claim the low road."
• "I think we agree, the past is over."
• "The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case."
• "This is still a dangerous world. It's a world of madmen and uncertainty and potential mental losses."
• "If I'm the president, we're going to have emergency-room care, we're going to have gag orders."
• "The legislature's job is to write law. It's the executive branch's job to interpret law."
• "Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream."
• "I think we ought to raise the age at which juveniles can have a gun."
• "I am mindful of the difference between the executive branch and the legislative branch. I assured all four of these leaders that I know the difference, and that difference is they pass the laws and I execute them."
•"We cannot let terrorists and rogue nations hold this nation hostile or hold our allies hostile.''
• "I want you to know that farmers are not going to be secondary thoughts to a Bush administration. They will be in the forethought of our thinking."
• "I don't think we need to be subliminable about the differences between our views on prescription drugs."
Einstein dies and goes to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter tells him, "You look like Einstein, but you have NO idea the lengths that some people will go to sneak into Heaven. Can
you prove who you really are?"
Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?"
Saint Peter snaps his fingers and a blackboard and chalk instantly appear. Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his theory of relativity.
Saint Peter is suitably impressed. "You really ARE Einstein!" he says. "Welcome to heaven!"
The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again, Saint Peter asks for credentials.
Picasso asks, "Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?"
Saint Peter says, "Go ahead."
Picasso erases Einstein's equations and sketches a truly stunning mural with just a few strokes of chalk.
Saint Peter claps. "Surely you are the great artist you claim to be!" he says. "Come on in!"
Then Saint Peter looks up and sees George W. Bush. Saint Peter scratches his head and says, "Einstein and Picasso both managed to prove their identity. How can you prove
yours?"
George W. looks bewildered and says, "Who are Einstein and Picasso?"
Saint Peter sighs and says, "Come on in, George."
Bush Solves a Puzzle
His closest advisors came to visit Dubya at the White House one evening and found him slamming down beers and whooping it up. They were astonished since he had given up drinking years ago. When asked why he was off the wagon, Dubya replied that he was celebrating finishing a jigsaw puzzle. They smiled and told him that wasn't much of an accomplishment. "Ah, but you're wrong. I did it in record time." When asked what that record was, he replied that he had finished it after only 6 months. Again, they told him that wasn't that great. "Oh yeah?" said the commander in chief, "Well the box says 3-5 YEARS!"
Political Jokes
Previous Joke | Next Joke
Famous Last Words
Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and George W. Bush were set to face a firing squad in a small Central American country. Bill Clinton was the first one placed against the wall and just before the order was given he yelled out, "Earthquake!" The firing squad fell into a panic and Bill jumped over the wall and escaped in the confusion.
Al Gore was the second one placed against the wall. The squad was reassembled and Al pondered what he had just witnessed. Again before the order was given Al yelled out, "Tornado!" Again the squad fell apart and Al slipped over the wall.
The last person, George W. Bush, was placed against the wall. He was thinking, "I see the pattern here, just scream out something about a disaster and hop over the wall." He confidently refused the blindfold as the firing squad was reassembled. As the rifles were raised in his direction he grinned from ear to ear and yelled, "Fire!"
Geplaatst door Couscousje
George Bush was benieuwd of hij nog een beetje populair was onder de Amerikaanse jeugd en bezocht een school. Hij hield een korte toespraak en vroeg de kinderen of ze misschien vragen aan hem wilden stellen...
Bob stak zijn hand op en zei: "Ik heb 3 vragen voor u."
1) Hoe heeft u de verkiezingen kunnen winnen, ook al had u minder stemmen?
2) Waarom wilt u Irak aanvallen zonder geldige regels?
3) Denkt u, net als ik, dat de bom op Hiroshima de grootste terroristische daad van de vorige eeuw is?
Op dat moment gaat de bel en de kinderen rennen de klas uit. Na een kwartier zit ieder weer op zijn plek en Bush stelt de kinderen opnieuw voor om hem wat vragen te stellen.
Nu steekt Joe zijn hand op en zegt: "Ik heb 5 vragen voor u."
1) Hoe heeft u de verkiezingen kunnen winnen, ook al had u minder stemmen?
2) Waarom wilt u Irak aanvallen zonder geldige regels?
3) Denkt u, net als ik, dat de bom op Hiroshima de grootste terroristische daad van de vorige eeuw is?
4) Waarom ging de bel 20 minuten te vroeg?
5) Waar is Bob?
Cc
:lachu: :lachu: :lachu: